A friend told me I should write something funny today but funny is not my default mode, especially when my mind is so cluttered with concern. Sure there’s war, terrorism, and hunger in the world, but what do I fixate on? The undoing of what used to be my favorite magazine and my favorite podcast. And is there anything I can do to stop it? No. They’ve done this to themselves. All I can do is withdraw my support from…
10 February 2014 ….Thanks again, FB friends, for listening to me whine. I’m so glad you’re here. You’re so much better than a diary. My personal Facebook writings during my 10 years on the platform all but replaced the traditional diary for me. In fact, the last diary I finished from cover to cover began in January of 2015 and ended in September 2018 (almost a month after going quiet on Facebook). I covered a lot of topics in my…
My decade of seeking and understanding Facebook friendships through the lenses of my mood disorder and personality disorder. I suppose I’ve held the same idealized view of friendship since childhood when I thought I could be everybody’s friend. Though this isn’t the place to delve into why friendship for me was placed on such a high pedestal so early on, I do know my self-worth was somehow entangled in the need to be liked. So I tried to practice the…
Stay focused. Stay on task. How do I even have a shot at independence if I can’t do these things? I wake up this morning, full of hope because it’s morning. There hasn’t been enough time for me screw up, has there? I peak out my bedroom door. The house is blissfully quiet so I go to the kitchen and take my first pill with a full glass of water. This one’s for my thyroid and must be taken on…
It’s better I write. Trust me. I’ve heard it said I write the way I speak and write with simplicity. But I don’t take offense. Large words have always intimidated me and I’ve learned to avoid them in ordinary conversation. Still, I’m delighted to read them or hear others pronounce them out loud, with unabashed boldness. I only wish I had that kind of confidence. As it is, I usually fear I’ll misuse words and embarrass myself in front of…